I just went into cody and cory’s room and I asked if he wanted to talk about parking, but him and cory were playing league of legends so he just said “not right now.” but was hardly making any effort to seem like he cared that i was trying to communicate the issue we’re having? so i said “okay when do you want to talk about it?” and he said “i don’t know” so i said “i mean we’re adults, we can talk about it, it’s not a big deal” and he said “i know i just don’t want to talk about it right now” so i said “yeah i get that, do you want to talk about it when you’re done?” and he was like “well i’m about to go to bed soon so no” and i was like “okay.. but you read my texts?” and he said “i read half of them” and i said “why would you only read half of them?” and he said “i was at work” so i said “okay, so do you want to talk about it tomorrow? because i feel like there’s a misunderstanding and i think it’s really easily resolved, we just have to talk about it” and he said “you said that five times already, i said i just don’t want to talk about it right now” so i said “okay, sorry” and walked out of their room and i felt really frustrated and embarrassed and my eyes were tearing up and i don’t even know why? this is so stupid. i don’t want to be made to feel this way in my house with people i live with.
Ok so long post about one of my boy roommates
Just to give some context — before I even moved in, the four of us talked about the parking situation. We have four cars, only two spots in the garage, and finding parking in long beach is IMPOSSIBLE after like 8pm. Cory’s car’s registration is currently expired, so his car is semi-permanently parked in the garage for now, and Kelsey doesn’t like parking in the garage, so Cody and I share the garage spot. It was agreed upon that whoever gets home last gets to park in the garage, which I think makes the most sense. 9/10 I’m the last person to get home from work because I always close, so I’ve been able to park in the garage on almost all of those nights. There have been 6-7 times where I come home from work at 12am and park in the garage because I assume they’re home, but it’ll turn out that Cory and Cody went to go see a late movie and they end up coming home a bit after me. I feel bad each time, but they don’t let me know if they’re going to be out late, so it’s not something that I do on purpose.
This past Sunday night, Cody and I were both closing at Haagen Dazs (I got him a job there a month ago) and we drove separately. Most of the times when him and I close together, he parks on the street because he drives faster than I do and because his car is little, so he can fit in more spaces. Well this past Sunday night, I got this text from him right as I was getting off the freeway, “I’m taking the garage because I have work early in the morning and I can’t wast time waking far to get to my car.” so I was like.. Okay, I guess that makes sense since I’m off on Mondays, I get it. Last night, I went out to dinner and a movie, and forgot to tell him that I would be out, but I figured since he gets home at 7pm that he might park on the street? But when I got home at 1am, he was parked in the garage, so I was kind of annoyed, but I realized it was my fault for not telling him that I’d be gone. I still was unsure if he was going to start changing the parking agreement we had, so I sent him a text last night that read, “Will you be parking in the garage every night before you work at the vet or are we going to continue leaving the garage for the last person who gets home?” And he replied this morning with this, “You were gone and plus you always get the garage. There have been plenty of times Cory and I have gone out and not got the garage and I don’t say anything. Also I’m being nice and sharing it with you a lot so I felt like taking it.” This upset me immediately but I tried to see it from his point of view and respond in a way that would make sense to him but also not be rude? So I replied with this, “I just assumed that I always get the garage because I close 3 out of five times that I work, and before I moved in, you both said that you guys leave the garage for whoever gets home last. Which is why I’ve been parking in it. I understand that it’s frustrating if you guys go out while I’m closing at work, and then I park in the garage because I assume that you guys are already home, but that is ONLY because I’m not aware that you guys aren’t home. I never do it on purpose. From now on, you can let me know if you two are going out to see a movie while I’m at work, if you guys will be getting home after 12:00-1:00am. But yesterday I assume you got home at 7:30, which is a much easier time to find parking than in the middle of the night, and I feel like that’s when it’s less fair. Maybe to you it feels like I always get the garage because you’re going out of your way to be nice, but to me it’s always felt like I get it because I’m just going by what we agreed on. I always park on the street the nights that you close and I don’t, because that was the agreement. There was never a selfish agenda, it was just me trying to abide by what we had agreed. So I hope that you can understand that.”
I think that that was well put and appropriate response? I’m trying really hard to not sound confrontational. It just makes me angry that he said “you always get the garage” like yeah, I do, but only because that’s what we agreed on? It’s not about me, it’s about the agreement. And him saying “I’m being nice by sharing it with you a lot so I felt like taking it.” Like for one, you share it because we BOTH live here and we BOTH pay rent. Secondly, I don’t park in the garage because I feel like it.. I park in it because we all agreed that the last person gets the spot. I feel like he’s viewing it as me always selfishly taking it because I feel like it, and I hope that I explained well enough that that’s NOT how it is. Am I in the wrong? Am I unable to see his side completely?
Needless to say I’ve been listening to “calm it down” on repeat in the car on my way to work this morning because I am uncomfortably angry and not wanting to be
how to you apologize for something that you’re not sure the other person cares about but that you still care about but are too afraid to apologize for in fear that they’ll be like “haha it’s okay you don’t have to apologize, it’s not like you need to ______ anyway” and then you’ll feel awful because you’ll be assured that they in fact don’t care about anything you do or don’t do. maybe stop caring also but if that were possible i would have done it already
omfg cody and i sat down at the table once all of the food was ready and sat out, and we started serving ourselves but kelsey didn’t get up off the couch, so cody yelled “are you gonna come eat?” and she pauses and says “um.. yeah… i didn’t know there was food” i swear to god. after an hour and a half of us making food in the kitchen while she sat within eye sight of us and she says “i didn’t know there was food” god help me. i need patience and forgiveness and her to get her shit together
smh while i’m in the kitchen washing and preparing asparagus, wrapping potatoes and mincing garlic, my girl roommate is just laying on the couch watching glee and hasn’t once asked if she can help. all i wanted to do was put some music on in the kitchen while i cook dinner and enjoy my beer but i can’t because i can’t disturb The Princess while she eagerly awaits the meal i am apparently preparing for her???
one of my friends that i graduated with invited me to her wedding in September and i’ve decided i’m going to buy a suit. i’m so excited. i’m thinking either navy or some shade of grey. i’m leaning more toward navy but everyone who i’ve been asking has said grey.
*to the tune of day-o* come mr. fed-ex man, deliver me my candles